Is There REALLY Someone for Everyone?

November 9, 2007

bridal-couple.jpgI always hear people giving the advice:  don’t worry, your time will come.  God is preparing your mate/preparing you.

I read it most recently at:  http://uniquemuslimah.wordpress.com/2007/11/06/and-they-lived-happily-ever-after/#comments  It’s a nice sentiment, and I know it is said to comfort the lonely, those who want to get married so badly.  But is it true?

Aren’t there people who go their whole lives, never finding “The One”? 

What do you think?  I’m going to think about this.  I wasn’t even going to blog today and really have to attend to other matters, but I thought I’d throw that out there.

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20 Responses to “Is There REALLY Someone for Everyone?”

  1. Erica B. Says:

    That’s a good question. This is how I see it from a a religous or spiritual point of view: God or the Universe, sends you your “person”. Now, they aren’t going to have a big, flashing neon sign that says Mr. or Ms. Right, it’s still up to you to realize it and a lot of people miss out. People get caught up in their on personal criteria for a mate (I’m not saying settle), and really overlook the person that’s really for them. I’m really believe that there is “someone for everybody”.

  2. safiya Says:

    Salaam Alaikum,

    I believe it, totally and utterly. Erica B makes a good point about being ready for that person.

    Obviously, you have to ‘tie your camel’ and make the effort to meet someone. Even when you meet that person, you still have to put the effort in to work as team and support each other.

  3. Lovely Says:

    100% without a doubt YES!!! The big question is do we recognize that person or do we overlook them for who we think we want? Do we want someone who is already successful over someone we can build our success with? Do we want the well dressed man over the man any real woman can dress herself (if that is even important), do we want the pro-athlete or the man who has a good steady job out of the limelight etc.. you see where I am going? ALSO, are we ready to be someone’s wife in the first place? That messes a lot of women up from the start!

  4. sparkle86 Says:

    I don’t really believe there is someone for everyone. Does it always have to be a romantic partner or someone you can connect with on a professional level? Some people forgo the quest of romantic love and focus on other persuits that make them happy. Mother Theresa, for example. For those that want love but can’t find “the one”, may be they’re looking in the wrong places, whatever it may be, don’t give up so easily.

  5. the diva Says:

    I think there are some people who are most comfortable being without partners and there can be value in that. I do think there is someone for people who want someone but maybe we have to be more realistic in what we think we want. My ideas about the ‘perfect’ man changed a lot from age 18 to age 28-I think they got better !

  6. BrittanyanJ Says:

    I believe the idea is a nice sentiment and it may be true…in some cases. But as average ages for first marriages climb higher than they were a generation ago, is that saying the God is now preparing men and women longer for marriage before presenting them to their future spouse? Why would it take longer now for that process to be complete, if there is one?


  7. Hey there!

    I think each person has many ‘soul mates’. As we grow and change so does the pool of potential mates.

  8. foreverloyal Says:

    OK I’m back, after thinking about it somemore.
    I also believe that there is a group of compatible people out there for any one person.
    I think that some people just make it too hard. I know someone who is waiting for God to just drop a good guy in her lap. She refuses offers of intros from family and friends, refuses to try the online thing, nothing.
    She just thinks that when it will happen, it will happen. She doesn’t want to force it.
    That attitude just kills me because, anything else you want in life, you make a plan and you go for it.
    Brittany, you also make a good point. What is up with the later marriages? I think some people are afraid to really grow up and “settle down”.

  9. Civilis Says:

    The world is far too cruel for this to be true. We are not all born attractive. There are many who will be alone. I’ve accepted it.

  10. Jim Says:

    The earth is populated with more Women than Men, and that alone says this impossible.

  11. foreverloyal Says:

    Well Jim, that’s only the case if you rule out polygyny. lol.

  12. anita Says:

    i will tell you lettasomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryonesomeoneforeveryone

  13. Nobody Says:

    Someone for everyone…I don’t believe that. I don’t because it’s just simply not true. No matter how much people want to believe that it is, fact is there are indeed people who go clear from cradle to grave and no one comes along. People who think there is someone for everyone are usually twitterpated and naive, too drunk on their own romantic happiness (more power to them) to believe that they live in a world where not everyone gets to experience that. Not realizing that they didn’t “earn” their significant other, but that they were handed to them on a silver platter, they usually sit and pontificate about “what ya gotta do” to get someone…it’s as bad as as winning at a roulette table, and then professing to the next person about where they need to put their chips, citing “experience”. They don’t have a clue.

    We just aren’t called for the same things. I wish people would realize that, and leave others alone. Let them remain in the shadows, if that’s their place.

    • hi187 Says:

      well said, nobody i totally agree with those people that have their own romantic lives believe that every ones meant to have that, just because they got happiness doesn’t mean everyone else is bound to as well, totally living in dream world

  14. kate Says:

    I really think there is somebody for everybody. I am having a hard time with my love life right now but i believe there is somebody out there for me and for you to. The big stickler is just finding that person… but think about it ladies! He is out there right now somewhere just waiting to find you! I heard a quote once that said ” the good girls are up at the top of an apple tree and the guys are to afraid to climb the ladder so they settle for the roten ones on the ground”…. even if you dont recognize him at first he IS out there looking for you :)

  15. Anonymous Says:

    well said, nobody, i agree

  16. Kevyn Jacobs Says:

    Nah, that’s just something nice we tell the lonely to comfort them. In reality, it’s just random chance, and some people will always be alone.


  17. No there isn’t. From a Christian perspective (seeing that I am a Christian), Paul makes it clear in 1 Corinthians 7:7 that while he would have all men be as him (celibate), some have the gift of singleness and others have the gift of marriage. From a practical perspective, we see in the experience of life that such a statemnt is not true because not everyone gets married. The optimist jumps in, “Well, some people CHOOSE not to find their someone”. Still, no matter what way you swing it, even if the difference is our personal “choice”, that still says that there is no promise of someone finding a mate. Plus there are people who “choose” that they WANT to find the right person and never do. Where do they fall on the spectrum? Also, if you believe that God made everyone to be in a marriage according to his design, how about unbelievers who get married? How about those in gross sin who get married? Are their relationships just as sacred to God as the Christian marriage, being that they are both under the universal promise that there is someone for everyone? I dont think many people really think about this question and just assume its a nice sediment, either that or like what is posted above, they are naive in their romantic happiness and feel since they arent the best of people yet they found true love, then that must mean everyone finds true love. There are three authorities people usually use to come to this conclusion: beauty, personal experiences, and pleasure. One establishes beauty as the final authority on relationships, and they see a not so attractive person with a significant other, they think “Since Person X found true love, that must mean there is someone out there for you”. The one who establishes personal expereiences of theirs will say “I went through X,Y,and Z, and still found someone, so you will too”. The one who says that pleasure is the final authority thinks “Relationships cause people to be happy, everyone should be happy, therefore everyone will be in a relationship”. None of these are true, the fact that all of these arguments dont amount universally to every individual to me is one of the many proofs that there is a God and he rules over all flesh. People who are meant to be together aren’t “soulmates” as much as they are a holy union/covenant sanctioned by God. Those who are meant for singleness are also sanctioned by God to serve him without the distraction of married life. Just food for thought, not saying that you wont find anyone, just answering the question with a firm NO.

  18. Haley Says:

    Good question, my opinion is no though. Sorry just what I think. I would say people do find the one for them so called soul mate but not everyone has one right. I’m single and I plan to be. Living live alone you don’t have to worry about hurting one anouther. My parrents love one anouther and have never spent any time from ones sight. I’m happy with seeing others have their true love but no their is not someone out their for everyone. :/ sorry to say to all ya lovers. That’s what I think. Peace my friends.

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